Mark Polonia’s One Million Babes BC is a delightfully chaotic romp through prehistoric times, blending sci-fi and adventure with a heavy dose of campy charm. The premise is simple but engaging: Ogg, the leader of a wild band of cavemen, selects the young Nila for a ritual sacrifice to appease the sky gods, setting off a series of absurdly entertaining escapades.
From the very start, the film establishes its uniquely offbeat tone. An AI narrator kicks off the credits, setting the stage for a world where paper bag rocks, CGI dinosaurs, and a monkey-suit-wearing character who… farts… somehow fit seamlessly into the prehistoric chaos. Scenes of cavegirl Nila doing Benny Hill-style runs from Raptors and Spineasauruses are guaranteed to make you chuckle, whether at the slapstick antics or the sheer audacity of it all.
Despite its low-budget effects, there’s an undeniable charm to the production. Jamie Morgan and Marie DeLorenzo bring familiar, comforting energy to the screen, helping elevate moments that might otherwise feel dragged out. And while the repeated mentions of Luna can get tiresome over the hour-plus runtime, the quirky humor and relentless imagination keep things entertaining.
One Million Babes BC isn’t a polished epic—it’s loud, silly, and occasionally bewildering—but it wears its budget limitations like a badge of honor. For those willing to embrace its eccentricities, it’s a joyfully ridiculous adventure that proves you can make something memorable even when the odds are hilariously against you.
Jessie Hobson